Harry Potter and the FanFiction meme
by Kohaku no Hime
Summary: Tagged by Alister's Girlfriend and my first foray into the Harry Potter fandom. Content inside includes blond Harry's inside mirrors.


_Huh...how interesting._

_I got tagged by Alister's Girlfriend to write this, and after I stalled a bit (because I am new to writing about Harry Potter) I finally finished it. I hope I kept everyone in character, and I hope you like it!_

_I own no characters except myself, and all references are indeed intended. You people know who you are in here :D_

_

* * *

_**HARRY POTTER'S WRITING MEME**

**Who are you and which house do you belong in?**

Well _this_ was out of the ordinary.

In the first place, Hogwarts had never seen any person walk into its walls and calmly introduce herself as Kohakuhime of Konoha. For the few Muggles (mostly girls) who happened to recognize that as a penname from a strange website called FanFiction, there were loud squeals of delight.

Of course, Professor McGonagall did ask for the girl's real name (because though she was not certain about many Muggle customs, she knew for a fact NO ONE named their child that), and that certain information was given in a low mumble.

In the second place, no one had ever heard of the Sorting Hat automatically any first year's house without even being set on the child's head.

…on a less believable note, it was hard to believe that the girl was a first year—she definitely looked WAY older than eleven.

Overall, Gryffindor had received a _very_ interesting addition.

* * *

**Who is your favorite HP character(s)?**

Remus Lupin was not certain just who this strange girl was that Harry had brought back with him to Grimmauld Place, but he found that he liked her already.

Sirius, on the other hand, did not.

"For the love of Merlin, get off of me!" cried Sirius in exasperation, trying—and failing—to pry the blonde haired teen off of him.

The girl smiled up at him and said brightly, "Never."

The raven haired Animagus turned to Harry with an alarmed look in his eyes. "Harry, where on earth did you pick up this crazy girl?!"

"I didn't, Sirius," said Harry. "She followed me here, I swear!"

Remus shook his head in amusement. "Better you than me, old friend."

"Well, we like her," chirped both Fred and George simultaneously.

"Not only is she a student at Hogwarts," began Fred.

"But she's an American one!" said George.

"Look, you said you liked Remus and the twins too! How come you haven't attached yourself to any of them yet?!" yelled Sirius, once again attempting to pry the girl off of where she had affixed herself to his waist.

"Because," said the girl innocently, " I already hugged them, and if Tonks walks in and sees me hugging Lupin she'll get all mad at me and hex me."

_Answer: The Weasley twins, Remus Lupin, and Sirius Black—and I don't like the way the movie makes them look, so use your imagination on their appearance._

* * *

**And who is your least favorite HP character(s)?**

Why did this keep happening?

She didn't understand it—every time she finished signing one stack of papers and sent them on their way, she would find that none of them made it to their destinations and those that did mysteriously lost her signature. To top that off, someone had switched and hidden all her normal quills and she had been forced to use her Blood-Ink quill. She had her name engraved into the back of her hand now. She had no idea just how that had happened, either.

What had Dolores Umbridge done to ever deserve this?

…that was PURELY a rhetorical question.

The short woman was so busy bemoaning the pain in her hand that she never noticed the blonde girl watching her office with a smug and satisfied look on her face. "Take that, you old hag," she whispered fiercely and tiptoed away.

Wait until Umbridge opened her lunch and found the surprise the girl had left in her sandwich.

* * *

**Pairings!!**

* * *

**Who is your most favorite pairing(s) in the book?**

Ehm…I don't really like the Harry/Ginny pairing because it's kinda of a spin-off of James/Lily (I always thought that Hermione should end up with Harry, and either Ron or Neville should be with Luna)…and though I like the Remus/Tonks interaction, it kinda ties with how much I like James/Lily—and James/Lily was canonically known about first.

Soooo…James/Lily it is, then.

* * *

**And who's your least favorite pairing(s) in the book?**

Lavender Brown plus Ronald Weasley equals WTF.

* * *

**Favorite pairing(s) that's not in the books? **_(KoK: See if you can spot the reference :D)_

Draco Malfoy was rather fed up with the Slytherin 'Loony', and he contemplated on whether or not he should just hex her for the heck of it. Yet every time he had tried to, he found that he couldn't because there was something in those chestnut eyes that prevented him from accomplishing that task.

…Nothing romantic, mind.

"Where are you dragging me off to now?" he asked, more out of a force of habit than anything else.

The girl grinned up at him and said, "I just want you to meet someone, Malfoy."

Draco sighed and allowed himself to be dragged down the corridor. A pale eyebrow rose as he saw a girl with blonde hair dragging along Hermione Granger in a similar fashion; it rose even further when the strange group halted in front of a broom closet.

"Hand us your wands for a moment, will you?" said both of the girls at the same moment, holding their hands out for Draco's and Hermione's wands.

Hermione and Draco frowned in confusion but agreed, handing their wands over to the two girls. "Now what?" asked Hermione. "Kohakuhime, I don't quite understand why you've dragged me here."

"Nor me, Loony," said Draco in annoyance, staring at the chestnut eyed Slytherin.

Both of the girls exchanged glances, then grinned in true Cheshire Cat fashion before shoving Draco and Hermione into the broom closet.

Ignoring the muffled shouts and the pounding on the door, Kohakuhime looked over at the Slytherin Loony and asked, "How long do you think it will take before they admit they like each other?"

* * *

**Now for your least favorite pairing(s) that's not in the book?**

Argus Filch purred in dark pleasure as he looked down at Umbridge—

…_Er…let's just not go any further with that train of thought, shall we? I think I just short-circuited my brain._

_

* * *

_

**Who or what do you enjoying writing about the most?**

Sirius eyed the girl warily from where he sat, waiting for her at any moment to spring up and attach herself to his waist once again, but whatever she was writing down in that notebook of hers was seemingly more important at the moment.

Good. Last thing he needed was some bloody American fangirl attacking him again.

Though…why had Moony made her sit in here with him?"

"Hey, Sirius?"

"Yeah?"

"What was your mom's name again?"

"Wolborga, I think? I dunno… I never really paid attention to that old hag to begin with."

"And your dad's?"

"Orion. I know that one because that's my middle name."

The girl nodded. "I see…" she said, once again writing.

Sirius frowned. "Why did you want to know my parent's names?"

"Oh, no reason…what were their hobbies?"

The raven haired man blinked. "Come again?"

"Did they ever play golf? Take wings off of butterflies? Collect toe jam?"

Sirius understood now why Moony had sent her in here. "Did you ask Lupin these questions?"

"Yeah, but he wouldn't answer them…do you feel like sharing with me some of the Marauder's antics?"

For the first time since the girl had come here, Sirius found himself grinning. "I don't have a problem with that at all."

* * *

**Who or what do find difficult to write about the most?**

"RAWR!"

Fred and George blinked, looking up from their latest experiment for their shop to stare over at the blonde girl. "What's got your knickers in a twist?" asked George bluntly.

"I can't do it!! I have tried every conceivable way of doing this, but I have failed miserably!" she wailed, bashing her head on the table.

Fred instantly levitated the table out of range of Kohakuhime's head and said, "Well, then, what seems to be the problem?"

"I am trying my hardest to write a one-shot of a pairing, and I can't write it!" said Kohakuhime in resignation. "Fred, you can bring the table back."

Once the table had been returned, Fred and George pulled up chairs and said together, "So what seems to be the problem?"

"My problem is that I can't write anything romantic. I have tried and failed…everything I write involving romance ends up either being a WAFF overload or it's cheddar cheesy," moaned Kohakuhime.

Fred and George, already aware that the girl wrote what she termed as 'fanfiction', exchanged glances and Fred asked, "Who are you trying to write about?"

Kohakuhime looked around her furtively before leaning forward. Fred and George, understanding that this was top secret, leaned forward as well. After furtive glances around her, the girl whispered, "I want to write a Dramione fic."

Despite how quiet the statement was, Fred and George swore they could hear a very distant shout of, "Nooooooo!"

* * *

**Group Photo! You in the middle, but who else is in it?**

"Alister's Girlfriend, you have Draco, right? Ohh, you even got Hermione, too! Okay, you three over there by the twins. _No bunny ears on Draco, George._"

"How did you guess?"

"Simple, my brain is all powerful. All right, CSF, come on and stand here; Wood, stand here by Lupin. Sirius, scoot closer to the group, you're outta focus…UMBRIDGE, GET OUTTA MY BACKGROUND!! GO HAUNT A POND, YOU OVERSTUFFED TOAD!"

After a few more seconds of rearranging everyone into position (including a girl named Phoenix who had brought Ginny with her), Kohakuhime grinned and set the timer on the camera. "All right, everyone, be ready to say cheese!" she said, slipping into the center of the group just as the flash went off.

The small group gathered around the quickly developed photo to see how it turned out.

"…I thought I said no bunny ears."

"You told _me_ not to. Never said anything about Fred not being allowed to."

* * *

**Now write yourself as if you were Harry Potter!**

Harry eyed the mirror carefully.

Now, true, he had seen many bewitched objects before, but he had never seen a mirror like this one. He was trying to figure out just where he had gotten blonde hair. Everything else matched, but his hair was _blonde. _

Experimentally, he raised a hand. The other Harry raised one as well. Feeling a little daring, he jumped up and down and made a face.

His reflection did what he did, like a normal reflection, albeit that his reflection was blonde.

Was he being paranoid?

"Ron," he said, turning from the mirror to look at his best friend. "come over here and look at this mirror for me."

The other redhead teen, who had his back to Harry, turned and looked at the mirror from where he was. "What's the problem?" he asked.

Harry blinked. "Can't you see my hair, Ron?"

"I can. What about it?"

"Can't you see that it's—oh."

Harry had turned back to the mirror only to find that his reflection had black hair once more. Rubbing his eyes fervently, he inspected the mirror closely. He could have sworn that his hair had been blonde just a minute ago…

"Harry, mate, let's go already! We're going to be late for breakfast!" said Ron, already heading out of the common room.

As the two boys left, Harry's reflection quickly slipped out of the empty frame and headed to Ron's trunk.

"Now to find that stupid bracelet Lavender gave him…" Kohakuhime muttered as she began sifting through Ron's clothes.

* * *

**If you would be so kind as to write a little oneshot that includes Draco…?**

Was it really possible to be friends?

After everything he had put him through, after everything his _relatives _put him through…was it even possible to be friends with the Boy Who Lived?

He had treated the blood trai—_Ron_…and that Mud—_Hermione_ (he was trying to break that habit of name-calling) as if they were garbage, and he had deliberately made himself into an antagonist. Worst of all, his family had taken so much from the other teen already: that house-elf, Harry's godfather.

Even after months had passed since Voldemort had fallen, he still retained his pride and refused to talk to the other teen; what exactly could he say? "Gee, I am so sorry that I was a rotten bugger to you all these years."

Draco Malfoy still had a shred of pride in him. He found he could not apologize to anyone, which was why he still avoided them.

Yet when Harry came forward first, extending the hand of friendship to him, Draco found that he was able to swallow his pride and accept that hand.

* * *

**Who do you prefer? Good Guys or Bad Guys?**

"Antiheroes."

Sirius looked up at Kohakuhime in confusion. "Sorry?"

"I like anti-heroes. Good guys that act like bad guys. You were one, once, and Snape is one (though I still don't like him), and Malfoy can be classified as a sort-of anti-hero," she said thoughtfully, nibbling on the end of her quill.

Sirius exchanged glances with Remus. There was no way he would ever understand just what ran through this girl's head.

Fred nudged George, and they both said together, "You're just saying that because this Seto Kaiba bloke that you always write about happens to be one."

Kohakuhime flushed and threw a sofa pillow at the twins. "Shut it, you!" she hollered.

* * *

**Now point your wand at someone… IMPERIO!**

Lycan Phoenix, and…oh. I know no other Harry Potter writers outside of Alister's Girlfriend and CSF.

…Anyone else who wants to give this a shot is also tagged.


End file.
